Darling Nikki

It was her birthday Saturday. Happy 44th, wherever you are.

Yeah, HER name is Nikki. The one gal I’ve been talking about of late. The one who broke my heart.

The one with MS

The one who has disappeared.

Two years ago, I set up a surprise birthday for her. Since I had keys to her apartment (she trusted me early on…and is a good idea for those with MS. I might need to check on her), I snuck in before she got off work. I decorated the place, got her favorite ice cream (Baskin & Robbins Lemon Custard…had to get directly from a B & R store), and bought a cake. I got her some small gifts. We had dinner, one she cooked, and enjoyed desert. I think we then watched a movie.

It was wonderful.

That was her 42nd. At the time, her seizures were pretty regular.

I didn’t care.

I just coped.

I enjoyed her company so much that the MS aspect was just, well, normal, if that makes sense.

I live in Saudi, so I couldn’t drink my memories away this Saturday. I did some errands, played video games, and had some cake.

And I thought about her. I thought about Nikki.

I wonder how she is doing. I really don’t know if she is alive or not. No responses on emails; no responses from texts.

I don’t know if she doesn’t have access, or decided to make sure I was out of her life.

I can only glean so much information.

I just hope she’s ok, that things are great, and that she is happy.

I am not….I miss you Nikki.



MMTOTD: Pins and needles are in my heart.


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